the big easy -> When It All Falls Apart

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 When It All Falls Apart, tag • LUCY CARMICHAEL
the first thing brent did upon arriving back in london was find lucy. she needed to hear about this before the press caught wind of it. honestly, he hoped the press never did. he didn't need the world to hear about his divorce. he'd already told his mother and she promised to find a two bedroom apartment for him before he finished tour. if he knew his mother, she'd find something with furniture or set up to have furniture delivered. he'd given her access to a small bank account he'd set up after he left jo's with enough money to find him a place and get it set up. he left a note for jo on the kitchen counter explaining where the money had gone from their shared bank accounts. he wondered how bank accounts would work without a marriage. he'd never had one that didn't have her name on it. before they got married, his bank account was an envelope of money between his mattress and his rent was paid with cashier's checks. he wasn't looking forward to going home in two months, knowing that he wouldn't really be going home. there wasn't a home that didn't have his family in it.

brent didn't want to tell lucy and the others this. he didn't want to tell anyone. a part of him didn't want to admit it was real, but he couldn't deny it. he'd talked to jo. she'd said the words. i'm divorcing you, brent. she'd told him why and the worst part was, looking back, she wasn't wrong. hindsight, as they said, was twenty-twenty. brent took in a deep breath and knocked on lucy's door. when she opened the door, he asked to come in. the moment they were inside and he was certain they were alone, he sat on the edge of the bed. perched was the more accurate term. he'd been sitting for too long on his plane back, another commercial flight because he didn't want to waste band resources flying on a private plane to a destination that was so frequently travelled to. it was like his kia. he never did things the 'rockstar' way unless it was necessary. "i need to tell you this before the press finds out," he began, looking down at his hands because he was certain that he'd start crying if he looked in her eyes. "jo filed for divorce." saying it didn't make it seem more real and he'd already said it a few times - to his mother, to his mirror, to himself. each time he said it, he just hoped that it would stick and start to sound like something other than a nightmare.
                        
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